How to Write an Attractive Dating Profile
When I first began signing up on the internet dating sites, it didn’t take long for me to notice that there are a lot of awful profiles out there. Some tell you nothing about the person, some say too much, and others are just confusing. And since this is your introduction to someone you’re hoping to get to know better, it helps to take it seriously and write a really good profile. Here are the things I’ve found that make me interested, or turn me off.
First, tell me about yourself. Many profiles start by saying that they don’t know what to write. Well, nobody does. Tell me how you enjoy spending your time. Do you like to watch sports? Do you love to travel? What’s your favorite TV show? Tell people what you enjoy doing, and the people who are attracted to the same things will be interested.
On that note, don’t lie. I once chatted with someone who admitted that he lied about his age, “Because you have to do that here.” Sadly, I had actually been hesitant to write him back because of his age, and if he said he was his real age, I would have been initially more attracted. But this rule even goes for more subtle things, where people may not even realize they are lying. I don’t watch TV and say so in my profile. Twice, I’ve met and started dating someone who says that we have that in common, and that their TV isn’t even hooked up. Later, I find out that they simply go to their parent’s house to watch Dancing with the Stars, or that they get on the computer to watch Glee. I just don’t enjoy TV shows, and no matter how you watch them, that is still TV.
Third, think about who you are trying to attract. While you should definitely be honest, I see an extraordinary number of photos of guys who are either drunk, hunting, or standing next to a race/sports car. And I always wonder whether they are trying to attract me or impress their frat buddies. Saying that you like to hunt is one thing. It’s honest, and it probably won’t attract me, but there are plenty of women who will find it attractive. But unless you are planning a date where you take her into the woods and place a gun in her hands, think twice about posting that photo of you standing next to a dead deer in the back of your truck. When we see a photo, we want to imagine ourselves in that situation with you. This is obviously something you enjoyed doing so much that you had someone take a photo of it to remember the occasion. I don’t want to picture myself next to you in a bar, where you are absolutely drunk, and I’m going to need bail money.
Fourth, tell the best aspects of yourself. I’ve seen a lot of profiles that post their favorite song lyrics or favorite poem. That’s great, but I would rather know why that poem speaks to you than hear somebody else’s words of love. Similarly, watch the humor. I read one where a guy started by making a joke that he’s a veterinarian/taxidermist, and will get your dog back one way or another (the man was a lawyer, by the way). In a different situation, it might be funny. As the very first words of introduction, it makes me want to ensure this man never finds out my street address.
Fifth, tell me something interesting. I love having some quirky little fact that I can reference when I write to you. Because without that, I feel awkward and I’m not sure how to break the ice. It’s fine to say, “I love my two kids, I have a pet dog, love watching the local team play football, and like to go to outdoor concerts.” Although those things are attractive, they don’t give me an opening. Now, if you include, “And the only ice cream flavor I like is cherry vanilla” it’s going to make me wonder why. I’m much more likely to write you and say, “I see we have several things in common… Just curious- why only cherry vanilla?” In my dating profile, I’ve decided to run with this idea, and I list quite a few things that not only tell the person a lot about me, but leave it open so that they can ask questions about it. This has been quite successful for me.
Sixth, don’t be bitter. If the very first thing I hear from you is, “Attention: Non-Fakes!!” I’m going to skip the actual profile. I want to be with someone who is positive and upbeat. I know you’ve probably been hurt in the past. I know that you’ve probably met some women that make you wonder what’s wrong with them. We all have. But if you can’t put your bitterness aside long enough to introduce yourself, you’re not ready to date. Think about it, if you met this person for the first time in person (and not on a dating site), would you start the conversation with, “I hope you aren’t using me for my money.”
These are simple steps to help you get the most out of your internet dating experience. By making just a few tweaks, you might notice an increase in the number of interested partners, and end up finding the love of your life.